Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Like Dylan In The Movies

So, in case I haven’t mentioned, I've recently moved to a highly gay concentrated neighbourhood in the city (It does have some great coffee shops but a bit too many gyms, if you know what I mean). And no, I’m not homophobic. Far from it. I mingle and have gay friends.

I am what the intelligentsia likes to call “liberal” and my mother “why??”, followed by a “I don’t get you. Befriend all this, but please marry a girl.”

So yes, I do befriend all "this".

But then, there are days...

Friday night.
Party 1. Bar near my hood. I think it was a birthday party. And I wear what are my straightest clothes possible. You know, regular fit jeans, black boots, grey polo and a light blue sweater.

(Come to think of it, my wardrobe's become very boringly straight off late - I think it’s my subconscious defense mechanism lighting up to the gayness around me).

Gay boy singles me out in the party and hits on me.

Party 2. Barhopped to another birthday party (don’t too many people get born around this time!). Now with previous incident in mind, along with my straight clothes I wear what is my straightest attitude possible.
But no, not enough. Another gay boy wants my number.

Saturday night.
House party near Soho. By now I’ve had enough and am leching at girls just to prove a point. But like a bad bollywood movie you know what's coming next. Right?

Now, as you know, I’m not homophobic. Far from it. But not far enough to like the extra attention in every party. It belittles my self chosen sexual orientation. And that just won't do.

Which is why now, I'm paying my female friends some serious money to hit on gay men. Give them a taste of their own medicine, so to speak, or rather, do.

Also, girls, if a boy's being the lecherous kinds, don’t jump so quickly and be so harsh. He might need pity more than the usual routine you throw his way.


Serendipity said...

Maybe your just irrestibly hot to men.
Phew, what a dilemna no? :D

Asphodel said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Asphodel said...

Sorry bout all these deleted comments peppering your wall, typos I cannot bear :-(

I agree with Serendipity, you are trying to tell us you are hot, eh.

Either way, try reverse psychology with the boys :-)

CrazyDiamond said...

oh you girls, taking it out of context. Nobody's hot. Only hassled.

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Aurora said...

Liar liar. Totally trying to show everyone how hot you are.

Also it is the sins of the past catching up with you...people assuming you are gay now...

You know what I am talking about. ;-)

Scarlett said...

I've been there. Lived in LA for a year, very close to West Hollywood, which is 'gay central' of LA. Had a number of gay friends. Used to visit West Hollywood clubs, which obviously were mostly gay. But my experience is that if gay guys try hitting on a straight man, and he tells them he's straight, they generally leave you alone. Try it, maybe it'll work.

Anki said...

u attention whore

... said...

I am a designer and therefore have many gay friends and have seen them hitting on 'very straight looking' men as well. It's a very 'just-for-fun' thing for them.

CrazyDiamond said...

@Aurora: Fine then. But in similar words of one your many anonymous commenters "why so cryptic?"
no no, I tease. Be cryptic.

@Scarlett: Yes I know. And they did leave me alone. I think I tend to exaggerate. Especially in my posts. :)

@Anki: it's a dirty job, but ....

@...: I am sure it is. And now it's my turn to have fun. One of my female friends just scared a gay guy by pinching his butt. Ah, the sweet smell of revenge.